6:55 PM
just now i had my MT paper for prelim. bloody, it was difficult. i give you people the chance to see my prelim schedule for this week and next week
21/8- MT Paper 1 & 2 (0800-1000, 1100-1230)
22/8- English Paper 1 & 2 (0800-0945, 1045-1225)
23/8- E'Maths Paper 1, Social Studies (0800-1000, 1100-1230)
24/8- Physics Paper 3, Elective History (0800-0915, 1045-1215)
27/8- Chemistry Paper 2, Pure Geog Paper 2 (0800-0915, 1045-1300)
28/8- Emaths Paper 2 (0800-1000)
29/8- Comb. Science Paper 1, F&N (0800-0900, 1000-1200)
30/8- Pure Geog Paper 1 (0800-0915)
so i MAY not blog till next thursday due to prelim. yeah people, wish me luck
2:30 PM
forget about the moodswing i had. i'm such a typical girl, so unpredictable.
during noon, i went to nipon's chalet at pasir ris. it was sad to see that dila was not there due to she has to work today as she's the only friend that im close to besides faiz. everyone was there including sharin too, but we didnt talk that much. i feel wierd somehow or another, seeing him. thanks to byg for the accompany. we spent our time there for about only 3 hours before proceed-ing to orchard. we went to eat, then went cityhall, for the starbucks. their oreo cheesecake is seriously melt to the mouth though it cost like $5.70 but it is a must to try. then we went boat quay. its been a looooooong time since we went there like a month or two ): around 9.20pm, we went back home.
otw home, i saw _____. he was riding bicycle under my void deck and i saw his friends slacking nearby. i bet you that he saw me but i pretend that i didnt see him which is so obvious cause he was just right infront of my eyes. i didnt bother to look up to his face. seriously, i no longer care.
anyway, thanks to byg, for somehow a great day. some things he told me, really was suprising. this makes me even more guitly for those times where i really show my ego-ness out or i seem to be unreasonable to him. i try not to hurt you or anything like that from now on. whatever it is, i swear, i only love you.
byg is currently watching his soccer match as his favourite team is playing. i'm sure your chelsea team is so gonna lose. i'm such a bad gf. tengok bola tu, ingat jugak lah org kat sini. jgn luper nak layan, sudah. kalau tak, besok i gna siku you.
i might be meeting byg tomorrow. hey, i'm happy about it. who doesnt? (:
11:30 PM
prelims coming in two days time. i got a c6 for my malay for O's. i'm retake-ing.
english oral for O's was alright. i guess i didnt talk much as i did for prelims.
i'm dissapointed over some matters currently. i feel like _________ so that it wont bothers me. now, i feel like crying. bloody. no one knows about it and i guess its better that way. this ruins my sunday morning ):
10:45 AM
NABEH. CHIBAI LAH. FUCKING ASSHOLE. DUMBASS. SIAL.
okay. seriously, i just feel like saying some vulgar words.
should i believe what he said or he just going to be the guy that gonna hurt me.
honestly, i'm angry at myself and no one else. siak aje aku nie cari pasal.
yes, i finally get rid of my blog song. bloody, its irritating.
&& now, people gonna change their view about me because of this post.
7:30 PM
1. From Now On, I Shall Stop Hoping That You Were Always There
2. I'm Letting You Know, I Did All That, Just To Know Whether You Really Care
3. Seeing These Dark Clouds In The Sky, Reminds Me How Much I Actually Misses You
4. Not Knowing Anything Is Equally The Same As I Dont Bother About You
5. It Is Sad To Leave Something Behind When You Know That Something Might Happen
6. Its Not That I Forget About that, Its Just That I Dont Want To Remember About It
7. Watching By The Fireworks, Hoping It Would Be Like The Last Time When You Are Still Here
8. Now, I Watching The Silhouette Of This Sunset Without You
credits myself, not particularly refering to someone. no, no. i'm not sad. i just have this urge to write qoutes with the weather like this and hearing such a lovely song. somehow or another, i actually feeling some of them ): anyway, tell me your favourites aite? i know its not that good that i used to do.
12:30 PM
its been four days since i've updated in here. bayang kept pestering me to update my blog but then, i was just plain lazy to do so till today morning that is. so let me recount what did i do/go for the past three days.
wednesday
i was supposed to have the ava bbq thing but then i didnt manage to go. i was already at ECP but then as bayang was there also and our relationship werent that good the previous days, i took this chance to spent my whole time with him, instead of going the bbq. i felt real bad seriously cause fazrin and ashik saw me there. but its alright, its not as if, i'll be going DC or something on monday so whatever about it. i ignored those guilty-guitly feeling the whole time.
thursday
i went town with my older brother, with byg tagging along. HAHA! seriously, this is my first time and the feeling is, oh my god, scary. i'm like scaring him to make him panicked when the actual fact is, i'm really nervous. overall, its still alright i guess but i so not gonna bring him anymore, to meet up with my family members, i feel so shy. end up, my brother bought only a brand new phone instead of his plan to buy shoes, clothes and etc. then we make our way to meet up with byg's friends and off, we go to cityhall. the night comes, watched the fireworks together (: we went home early due to he had to rush home. you dont have to feel guitly about ruining our plan when its something that you didnt expect to happen at the very last minute aite? even though the thought of me hanging out with either kimmy, faiz or roy ever came across my mind during that moment of time, but i dont feel nice just letting him go home all alone when he's not in his mood. how nice can i be i? i know.
i went bugis to study with roy and rafi. i didnt manage to finish the chemistry homework nor my physics homework due to i'm sort of hungry and my fingers were numb of the coldness that i couldnt ever write nicely. seriously roy, dont never bring rafi along next time. you're so not going to study with him around. anyway, i knew that going to happen when you told me you bringing him. but i dont feel nice, if i said i mind you bringing him along. studied for 3 hours then i met up with byg around there. we went BK then bought my slippers at last at m]phosis. that slippers is preetay (: by the time 7 plus, we reached pasir ris park. we talked about alot of stuff. yeah, i mean ALOT.
i promised i wont do the same thing that i did when i was with elfie. i so not going to betray you. i'm sorry that i'm still going out with the other guys but its all for the STUDY. why should i do all that to hurt you when you're the only one i love (:
today
supposedly i have plans to study with kimmy today. but i'm not sure whether its confirm. i texted him, but no reply. *pray hard that this plan wont get cancelled* if it is, i got no plan, and i have to panic and find another person to study with. bloody ass. i hate it when this happen. GRRRRRR!!!
off i go. i going to eat my breakfast. enjoy your day, people [:
10:30 AM
i'm not angry seriously cause the actual fact is, the matter doesnt hurt me at all nor a single bit. but i just get angry for goodness sake, i dont even know. i guess i'm just dissapointed at myself terribly. sharina, see the reality. honestly, it can never happen. i'm just being plain stupid. since i dont get it my way, i let it be it in your own way. i just gonna close both of my eyes, and pretend i dont even know. most probably, i'm just being hard on yourself. what can i expect a change from you when i, myself still going out with my guyfriend. i'm so dead tired of getting pissed off over every single little thing. i'll forget everything, i try.
bloody menses make my mood this way.
7:00 PM
i'm seriously bored at home. i wanted to go out actually with ANYONE will do but i'm just plain lazy and where can i go with singapore being small and i've already went most part of singapore that i can go to. this is pathetic, i know.
anyway, happy two months, love. i know we've gone through alot especially the last few weeks that we nearly break off but eventually, we didnt. luckily that is. i love you more than ever seriously. if i dont, you will see me knowing some guys in the net which i dont do it anymore. i know there's a time where i have really dissapointed you so much and even broke the trust that you had in me and i'm truly sorry about it. it wont happen again, i try. we have this special thingy going on, so dont worry about me giving up on you cause i wont. even if i will, it wont come any soon now. like what i have promise you, i gonna break your longest relationship record. that is something you have to look out for. i sayang you (:
yesterday, went baybeats with byg. saw tons of people i know. from rudy, tursina, hidayat, hanif, shafiq, firdaus and some, i dont remember. and on the way to cityhall mrt to go home, i saw shahrul. *pray hard, he didnt saw me* i just despise seeing him, seeing him make me realised all over again my mistake i did to him and byg. that suck pretty bad. overall, yesterday was alright i guess, but too many people, headache. i managed to study for about 2 hours in esplanade library before going to baybeats. somehow, i feel guilty of not studying entirely yesterday ):
fyi: IF i'm still in relationship with haiqal today, it would be our 2nd year anniversary already. HAHA! macam faham aje aku nie. thats lame to remember such stuff anymore but i cant help it. its in me since eons ago.
8 more days to malay O LVL results
12 more days to O LVL english oral
17 more days to prelim exam
76 more days to O LVL exam
so have everyone prepare for it?
whatever it is, i'm still waiting for 11.11 pm to give bayang a greatest wish (:
6:00 PM
yes, a new skin in here. it took me nearly 2 hours of doing. its been awhile since i 've done any in the first place.
stayed back in school just now to study physics. in the end, i didnt study that much due to it was like freaking hard to understand especially the last topic. now, i realised, chemistry is easier to do than physics and no one ever told me that. -_-"
on the way back home, i saw cast boy near aljunied mrt, chat a little while before he went off to cityhall. and also around there, sharin saw me. he was like chasing after me when i was walking home cause i didnt see him earlier. i was suprised to see him there seriously. its been like exactly 9 months we broke up and we did not have the chance to talk. i think its more like i'm avoiding from talking to him all these while and FINALLY, i just did it.
anyway, 18 more days to prelim, 13 more days to O LVL oral english and 79 more days to O LVL, now i'm stress even more.
&& you know what, this coming sunday is our ______ (:
11:40 PM